Calmer than you are, Dude..

Ok folks, that's it. It's been ten years, off and on. Almost to the day. I'm finally trying to quit smoking. For good.

Aside from waking up at 10 am, for no reason, it started out as a good day. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and I was going into nicotine deprivation and twitching like Michael J. Fox. Still, I can deal with it. I'm calmer than you are, Dude. Then I go to Wendy's for a spicy chicken sam'mich value meal and what happens? My brakes in my car go out. Pedal to the floor go out.

I make it home, thankfully, and eat my number 6 value meal. Then I hit the parts house with the old man, and go outside to fucking fix them, A-Team style. What happens? It starts raining. If there's one thing I hate more than working on cars, its working on cars IN THE RAIN! So yeah, its raining, I'm taking off the back wheels of my cougar and watching my dad smoke the way a fat girl eye humps the ice cream buffet at Ponderosa. Murder was contemplated. Both of my father, and of the engineer that designed my car. Fuck you, Henry Ford. I will see you in hell for where your company puts rear brake lines.

So in conclusion, I'm going to need eveyone to not be a douchebag for the next week or so, or I might kill you. Not you know, physically murder you, but I might go to your mom's house and punch her in the tits for raising you to be retarded. You've all been warned. And so has your mother.

Thanks kids.
Dr. R